Friday 17 July 2015

Chemo.. For Life

I've started the IV chemotherapy.  Six rounds of that every three weeks, then they're thinking of putting me on chemo pills.  I'm hearing mixed reactions from people that have been on the pills, so far. 

This chemo is supposedly easy to tolerate.  So far I can agree with that.  I'm tired, and at times I don't realize how tired I am, but the nausea has been easily controlled, and I'm just starting to get joint/bone pain.  All the effects are supposed to be temporary but I don't know how to take that when the instructions all say "once you're finished..." to summarize effects.  If I can't tolerate the pill chemo, there's a good chance I'll be switched back to this IV chemo.  For you see, I'm stage IV (four), my cancer metastasized.  I'll never be "cured" we're trying to contain it, keep it from spreading further.  I'll be on treatment for life.

Many don't realize this.  Once you cross from stage III to stage IV you go from trying to cure it to keep it from claiming entire organs.  You hope that you can keep it contained.  You will be living with cancer, some refer to that as a "Lifer".

I have started up a "bucket list", I'll be sharing that at a later date.  I'm starting to look at what I want in life more than just what I need.  Everyone hopes they'll be remembered, it the end.  I'm looking at how I hope to be thought of.

I'm living with cancer, living with chemo, but I'll be living.

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