Take a moment to remember

"In war, there are no unwounded soldiers." -Jose Narosky
Lest we forget

Thankful on Turkey Day

This is Canadian Thanksgiving weekend.  We will be roasting turkeys, cooking up veggies, baking up desserts, and enjoying the company of family and friends, if we are of the lucky ones that can.

I am thankful to be here, with my son and husband.  Thankful Mike is not sailing or duty this weekend, thankful our families are close, thankful we have warm shelter, food, and clothes.  Things never work out exactly how you expect them to, but God has a way of giving you exactly what you need when you need it.

A shout out to those who are not so fortunate at this time: their families are split to keep our country and other countries safe (be supportive of them and their families!), they have no money or food and need help (donate to the Food Bank and local charities if you can!!), and those with no shelter or warm clothes (donate your used items to help them year round!).  We are all in this together.  There's only one Earth, she's all we have.  Share her with each other and every living creature blessed to be on her.

Clear the Air

So apparently someone thinks I said my husband isn't taking care of us bc we're having some financial issues, well let me set this straight:

My husband is a GREAT person and thinks the world of our son and I.  He serves his country and that takes him away from us not because he wants to but because his job requires it.  As to our financial issues, there was a mistake made by the company and it's been taken care of and we should have the hundreds of dollars that was not sent to us soon.  Bad things happen, and they cause people to be upset, and I used this blog as an outlet.  If you have any issues or concerns, comment and I'll get back to you.  I never want to hear someone is putting words in my mouth again!

I will defend my husband any time, any where, he's the best thing that ever happened to me and the greatest father our son could ask for!

[/rant]

The reality of it

I want to first say that I do appreciate having someone say, "If you need anything call me" and "If there's anything I can do, honestly, let me know".  But the reality of it is do you really think I'm ever going to?

Everyone has rough times and I don't know if it's just me but I don't call around when times get that way for me.  Maybe I should, maybe I'm just too stubborn for words.  But the bills and the cash flow don't match up so I'll have only one or two meals that day to make sure Archer has three and doesn't go without.  The car is low on gas so I'll avoid leaving the house.  My nights become so restless it's barely called sleep because my heart is off protecting/serving our country, but I'll still get up every day and take care of Archer.  My injuries cause so much pain it feels like death every time I move but I'm still going to make sure Archer gets cared for.  I feel lost because part of me is so painfully evident that it's not me anymore, but I'll still be seen in public.  It's hard to see because the tears in my eyes mask the irises too often.  The thought of going to the house in Sackville causes me to have a tightness in my chest and headaches from the thought of having to deal one more second with those neighbours but I'll still go.

So that's my life.  That's the pain of having to deal with the consequences of bad health and my husband needing to be away.  But the moment he comes home I'll not think once of the times without him.  Hearing Archer laugh as I tickle him will brighten my day for that moment.  Seeing his eyes light up when I ask if he wants to go on the slide will always bring me cheer.  Maybe one day the pain in my back will be gone.  And perhaps I'll look fully like a woman again, some day.  But till then, I guess you're safe from expecting a call from me.  But I do like the gesture.

All by myself *insert cheezie music here*

My hubby was told to go join his ship in Europe, so now my son and I are on our own.  Beside the fact that I miss him like mad and will be counting the seconds till we're together again, I could normally function perfectly fine with he was sailing for his extended trips.  Only before I didn't have a slew of health issues...

Day one of fully on my own has been interesting, full of back pain, leg numbness, headaches, and even a stabbing pain in my right leg (that's new!).  I'm curious how I'll fare with this, especially since it's starting to look like the insurance company will no longer be giving me any assistance.  Now I get to try to function on my own and try to figure out how to get the bills paid!  Oh joy! :D ... -_-

But onto another rant for now, one thing that I did want to mention out to those that do read this blog, if you have any friends or family that are married into the military I want to give you some advice: NEVER ever ever ever say to them "well, it's what you (he/she/they) signed up for" when their loved one leaves and not expect to get either tortured silence or daggers stared at you from behind glazed eyes.  Yes, we know they are required to leave, but guess what, we do not want them to leave.  Saying that to the person will pretty much make them never want to talk to you about any issues they have again.  Why not just go up to a person with cancer that chose to undergo chemotherapy and is complaining about being sick and losing their hair and say "well, it's what you signed up for".  Sometimes the choice is made because it is the only way for our lives to continue the best way we can.  Don't you think that if my husband was offered a job that paid the same amount and same benefits plus kept him home he'd take it?  But think about it, if he didn't go, someone else would.  What if there was no one willing to separate from all they love for weeks/months on end?  What then?

So count your blessings and tell those you love that you love them.  And don't belittle a person's sacrifice to make the world a better place.  Because, believe it or not, that's what both the military member and their family are doing every time they're deployed.